At first I was afraid of the dark retreat, as people usually are of things they don’t know.
After booking a date about six months ahead, I set about finding out something about it, reading up and so on.
I had no idea what to expect from darkness therapy, but I was hoping it would resolve various buried problems from my childhood. Things in general that affect me in everyday life, where I have no idea why I sometimes behave the way I do in certain situations.
The dark retreat started the process in advance
While I was waiting for my date to come round, lots of memories and somehow traumatic issues opened up in my head and gradually got resolved too.
When the long-awaited date arrived, I set off slightly nervous but one hundred per cent excited – ALL OR NOTHING! 😉 I travelled by public transport and walked from the station to the place where the dark retreat was held.
Just finding the way (with the help of a printed map, I’m not a fan of smartphones and mobile devices in general) was an experience in itself, and I felt that for the first time in my life things were simply happening the right way, and I was going after my goal all the way.
I arrived just before 7 pm and Tomáš gave me a warm welcome and took me straight to the cabin. It was cosy inside, everything felt like it was in its place (a really well thought-out layout so you can find your way around in the dark)… and that SMELL of wood!
A dark retreat just the way I need it
I got a few basic instructions on how the retreat works, the cabin’s facilities and the daily routine. Some fruit to keep me going until morning. And above all reassurance that everything would be exactly the way I myself needed it to be inside. I had a quick shower and switched off the light…
What happened over the following week can’t be passed on or conveyed in any way. Gradually my thinking loosened up and I simply existed. Without the fear that, as I discovered, is my daily companion in ordinary life. Without the need to do anything (I didn’t even take the exercise gear and puzzles for when I might get bored out of my rucksack).
The main event of the day for me (apart from endless contemplation and sinking into deeper and deeper depths of my inner self) became food. That heightened sense of taste caused by switching off sight, boosted further by the variety of goodies that Tomáš and Lenka brought every day …
The whole time I didn’t have a single panic attack, negative thoughts or even the urge to give up and leave. I didn’t even feel the need to be in contact with my hosts. In the dark I found that I could actually stay there and feel absolutely great (like in the hotel of my dreams). The whole time I missed only one thing – music, which is an essential part of my life 🙂
On my dark retreat I came to know light
In the dark I came to know only absolute, warming light, calm and peace, which is missing from my life in the light. That is probably my main impression a month after the retreat. Of course, the morning I came out into the light I arranged another retreat sometime in the winter months. I’ve become addicted to the dark 😉
I can only recommend this experience, and so a dark retreat, to everyone, because you get to look inside yourself, and on top of that two little rays of sunshine, Tomáš and Lenka, will look after you in the dark as if you were their own!
Martin
