I wanted to stay longer

Every story that unfolds in our space brings a completely unique view of the inner world and of personal transformation. We think about how to invite people into the dark and why one should go through such an experience at all. Darkness therapy offers a deep space for anyone who needs to switch off, whether they are dealing with overload at work, family relationships or searching for inner peace.

The following lines capture the authentic experience of one of our participants, who did a three-day dark retreat with us and then came back for a whole week.

Rest and the search for your own meaning

In my view, a dark retreat will serve just about anyone brilliantly. Whether you’re looking for a rest from work, feel overloaded at your job and in family relationships, or just really need to switch off. Darkness therapy also works brilliantly when you’re looking for something within yourself, dealing with your problems or demons, or searching for the meaning of life. The dark has a wonderful quality in that it lets you experience and think everything through in peace.

There’s no phone, laptop or television waiting for you there. You won’t see anyone else there to make contact with and chat to. You don’t even take a book, which means you can’t entertain yourself any other way. You really have to live through the experience, sort out your thoughts and work through them. Personally, darkness therapy gave me inner peace, an appetite for the next steps in life and a clear outline of what I want and need to change in my life.

The unpredictability of the inner process

Before going in, I had a clear idea in my head of what I wanted to change or sort out. In the end only part of what I’d planned came to me. Because during the dark, completely different thoughts came up from the ones I went in with. I’m hugely happy about that. I know I’ll cast off my fear and go into the dark again sometime in the future, after a bit of time has passed, and work through whatever comes up then.

You do well to prepare yourself mentally for what you’d like, but then not to resist what actually comes. Because what we most truly need within ourselves naturally surfaces in that dark.

From three days to a whole week

My first darkness therapy didn’t last a whole week straight away. In the autumn I first went for three days. I got the experience as a gift, because I’d had great recommendations from a friend and an acquaintance. Even those three days had an incredibly powerful effect.

When the alarm went off on Saturday and I was supposed to leave, I felt sad and didn’t want to open the door. On Friday evening I was genuinely thinking of waiting behind the closed door and asking for an extension. But then the reality of life outside caught up with me, because people were waiting for me out there and nobody had any idea I might lock myself in again.

So I left with the intention of coming back. And that’s why I came back for a whole week. The week went brilliantly. On Wednesday, admittedly, I wondered whether I’d had enough and whether I hadn’t already got everything out of it, but I calmed down and decided to wait. Thursday then gave me something completely new that I wouldn’t have gained by leaving early.

Accepting yourself and returning to the light

I feel that in the space of the dark everyone finds what they need. If I said that people find themselves there, it might sound frightening, but at the same time in a terribly reassuring way. When they find themselves and manage to accept themselves in that dark, they leave with a really lovely feeling. I myself had to accept some things I didn’t like, but that step led me to wholeness.

A dark retreat isn’t just a seven-day sleep or an ordinary holiday. You do get a rest, but it’s mainly about coming to terms with yourself, with your situation and your feelings. After this experience people will love the light and look forward to it. When I stepped outside in the morning, the first little bird sang more beautifully than I’d ever heard before, because I was finally really listening to it. Darkness therapy lets you realise what you have and gain both reconciliation and contentment.